Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Honest Conversations

I was driving down the road today praying and just having a wonderful time talking to God. I was doing all the talking and not a lot of listening. Then He spoke. Today was one of those days that He really made me squirm.

Here's how the conversation kinda went from my side:

"Father, I'm really struggling right now. I want to be closer to you and there's just something in the way"

"Ohhhh, you mean that unforgiveness...but I have forgiven him, even if he doesn't deserve it"

"I know, I really do want to forgive him, but I start praying and I get mad all over again...I just get worked up and then I move on."

"What do you mean by 'why do you want to get even?' "

"I know that he is human and therefore not without fault and that I am just the same way. But God..."

"Lord, I do love you and I do want to be obedient. I know that you love him and that you love me. I know that he is as much your son as I am your daughter. Forgive me for holding on to and even cherishing unforgiveness in my heart towards my brother in Christ. I forgive strings me love him in the way you do."

"Send him a Christmas Card?? Tell him I love him! Okay, I will as soon as I get home."

"I love you too! Thank you for hearing me. Thank you for correcting me and setting me on the right path."

I continued my drive, eyes a bit misty, backside a bit sore, heart a lot lighter. And yes, a Christmas Card has been done and is addressed and ready to go.

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